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Creating memories for Christmas


Oh so thrilled its the holidays! The kids are screaming, fighting over who gets to ice the last cookie... the hubby isn't helping at all with anything and we still haven't started shopping! Ugh!

No really, I'm kidding... sort of... This is such a wondrous time of year, I can't help but mindful of the lovely memories I have of growing up. Every moment is magic during the season and I honestly feel very nostalgic being back in the area I grew up in. I'm so happy our boys are living so close to the mountains and even more important, closer to their precious Grandparents. We went to look at Christmas lights the other night and it was absolutely joyous- even with the little bit of silly bickering in the car! We stopped by my folks as well.



Their warm and cozy house smelled of spaghetti and oregano. Mom was cooking and hadn't finished decorating the tree yet. There were boxes everywhere and the second I came in I wanted to cry and hug both my parents for making it seem as though no time has passed at all. In that moment I was 14, coming down for dinner, smelling the food mom was making, hearing the fabulous classic Christmas tunes while the tree stood beautifully in the front room awaiting to be dressed up. It was heavenly.
I know how lucky I am to have the family I do. I'm blessed with my very stressful but still my best friend, my hubby Derek. I'm truly thankful for my delightful and inspiring boys who lift my spirit even more this time of year. I thank God for them.



And ... how do I write this words... I'm so happy, thankful, scared, hopeful and did I say grateful- to have my mother here another Christmas. It's utterly painful to watch her suffer through chemo, especially when they're starting to wonder and worry if its working anymore.
My mom has always made this time of year like a story book or a beloved holiday movie full of incredible memories of food, laughter, decorations, cookies, music, dancing, presents and most of all love... Love that just spills from her soul when she watched one of us open something she had picked out just for you. Besides my children, she is everything I know about love. She has taught me to be the person I strive to be every single day. The world is beautiful because she is in it and I don't know how I'll ever see it any other way.

She's so dear and so easy to please; the joy and pride in her voice is completely obvious and touching. I called her last night to tell her I'm making cupcakes for my son's class- in the apron she gave me and she just gushed with how happy that makes her. Stopping in the moment, recognizing the season-- the memory; the kitchen is a wreck, icing is everywhere, the kids messing around before bedtime, the hub's TV up way too loud and ... the joy of my mother's sweet voice in the phone. Nothing is better than that.
Her voice is like song no matter how much pain she's in.
And so these holidays are even more important as I try to hold onto my mother and all the beautiful memories she's given me-- while trying to create some amazing memories for my boys as well. If I try very hard and emulate even half of what my mother has made -then I know I'll be doing pretty darn well.....
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